I Only Told the Moon
by FearlessLeigh
Summary: AU. No A, No Paige. No fetus Emison. What happens when Emily comes home after her dad dies, how does she cope, and who is there to help her through it all?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

It's the first day of classes. I haven't walked these halls since I was a student. My dad dying flipped my entire word upside down. Currently the whole gang is back in Rosewood. Spencer is here helping her mom with her campaign, Aria is here writing a book with Ezra, and Hanna came here to help her mom with the finishing touches on The Radley Hotel. I came back because I graduated with a degree in sports management and I couldn't bare seeing my mom be alone for now. I knew I could get a job anywhere. Just so happened that good old Rosewood High was in need of a new swimming coach and athletic trainer. I've been here about a week, staying in my mom's house although she is about to move out and I'm looking for my own place. I sit in the teacher's lounge and sip my coffee. High school was amazing. Star athlete, high on the academic scale, and the ladies loved me. I had a revolving door of girlfriends, but nothing too serious. I just found it extremely hard to fall in love with anyone after losing Maya the way I did. For me opening up is my biggest fear when letting someone in could just mean having to say goodbye to them. My dad's death has for sure made that worse. I'm brought out of my thoughts by the door, I look up, and instantly I forget how to breathe. This beautiful woman walks towards me. Blonde hair, the bluest eyes, and dimples. She smiles softly as she sits next to me. "Hi I'm Alison Rollins. Everyone calls me Ali. My cousin Spencer told me you were starting today and to just help you get a feel for this place." She extends her hand, I shake it reluctantly.

"It's nice to meet you Alison. I'm Emily, which I'm sure you know and thanks." I say drily. I stand up to finish my coffee and throw the cup away. Before I get to the door I hear Allison's sweet voice.

"See you around I guess." I turn to look at her and she looks a little hurt. I just shoot her a smile and wave before heading to the gym. I remember stories of Alison growing up. We went to school with her brother Jason who Aria dated for awhile. Alison was a bully, and ruined people's lives. And although we all have been busy I'm positive Spencer would've told me that she worked here. Maybe she just overlooked it. But I know this place like the back of my hand, I lived in this gym, and pool. We ran these halls, we were the popular kids. I head to my office, and begin to look through paperwork. I don't have students first period so I have a gap in the time I get here and actually have to do anything. In true Emily Fields fashion I will probably be the only person early to work to do nothing. The day begins pretty slowly but then out of nowhere it's ending and I am walking to my car.

Today was not as scary as I thought it would be. I'm putting up a notification for swim team try outs tomorrow and I'm really looking forward to that part of my job. I get to my car and see Alison walking to her car. She is beautiful without a doubt. She's wearing blue and it looks like there's absolutely no other color on earth that she should wear. I pull off before she notices me although I peek at her in the rearview mirror and can swear she stopped to turn around before she got in her car. My phone buzzes and I look at it quickly. A message from Hanna saying that everyone was meeting at The Radley for dinner, something about trying out the new menu before it opened. I ran home really quickly to change clothes before heading over. I get there and the girls are all sitting at a table. I sit down and order a drink. We all catch up on each other's lives, and eat some really amazing food. Half way through the meal Spencer blurts out "Oh did you meet Ali?" As she looks my way with one eyebrow up. Everyone silences themselves as if they know something I don't.

"Yeah sure did. She seems… different than all of the stories I remember." I said as I finished the last bite of my food.

"Well haven't we all changed Em?" Spencer giggled out. And she was right. Maybe I jumped the gun on judging Alison from her past. I mean I didn't even know her, just knew of her.

"So what's her story?" I ask out of curiosity.

"Hmmm. Long story short. She grew up, became an English teacher, and got married. Last year her husband and mom died in a car accident." Aria answered knowing her as well as Spencer since she dated Alison's brother for almost three years. I look at Spencer who is looking at me questioningly. We go about the rest of our meal and conversation before we part was. We say our see ya laters and make plans for a girls night at Hanna's loft in a few days. I head home where my mom and I watch movies until she falls asleep on the couch. I cover her with a blanket and head up to my room. I left my phone on the charger because I just left the only people who text or call me but my phone is blinking. I pick it up, take it off the charger, and I have a friend request on Facebook from one Alison Rollins. I click on it and it goes to her page. Her profile picture is a picture of her alone, her cover is a picture of her standing in between here mom and who I'll presume to be her husband. Her smile noticeably different in both pictures. Suddenly I feel a twinge of emotions. Although Maya and I were young when she died I feel Alison's pain to lose the person you want to love forever, and of course I can relate to losing a parent. I gladly accept the request before going to shower. I've agreed in my head that I'll be nicer to Alison tomorrow because honestly, I'm she needs it. I can only imagine how many people who know her still treat her like a monster because of who she used to be, and haven't realized that she needs friendly and caring people in her circle. I lay in bed and think about my day until I fall asleep.

My mom is always already out the door by the time I get up and get ready for work. I pick out an outfit for work, and make myself some breakfast. I realize what time it is and I wrap up my food, finish getting ready, and get going. I pull in right beside Alison who I see is as timely as me or more. I head to the teacher's lounge to grab some coffee before going to my office to eat my breakfast when I see Alison eating at a table alone. I make myself a cup and coffee before sitting right beside her. I guess eating here wouldn't hurt. She let out a shy hello and I said hi back. I look up a few times to catch her looking at me, and I'm positive I blush each time. "What exactly is on your sandwich? It looks and smells amazing."

"Oh it's just toast, avocado, tomato, bacon, and mayo." She looks down at her muffin as if it's not adequate. "I like muffins, your muffin looks good." I blush thinking how dirty that came out. She giggles.

"It's homemade. I bake. A lot. It's a cinnamon swirl muffin." She says proudly and I can't help but smile. "Would you like to taste it, my muffin?" She held a small piece up and waited on a reply. I almost choke on my coffee. I look at her face to try and figure out if she is teasing me or is she as wholesome as she seems. I notice a slight smirk.

"I'd love to." I sit up and eat the piece right from her fingers and wink at her. I'm usually not so forward but in this instant I couldn't pass up on having the upper hand. She smiles a smile that made my heart melt as she escaped from eye contact by looking down. The bell rings.

"Shit, I'm late!" She hops up and grabs all of her things before she bolts out the door. I get another coffee, and walk to the gym triumphantly. Score: Emily- 1, Alison- 0.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

I went through my day pretty easily. A few days from now I have the swimming team tryouts. I must say this is by far one of the easiest jobs I've ever had. I lock up the gym around five, anyone who is inside can stay in but otherwise you're locked out. I'm probably one of the few staff members who stays so late. It's been few days since I've spoke to Alison outside of saying hello in passing. I'm not sure how she feels about me flirting with her. Hell, I'm not sure how I feel about it honestly. I don't know what came over me. I mean I do, she's beautiful but it's just so out of my character. It's like she ignites something inside me. I say goodbye to the few students left inside before I leave. I step outside, the door already. As I walk towards my car I notice Alison is having some trouble getting he car to start, lucky for her she's parked right beside. I unlock my door and put my bag in my backseat before turning around and knocking on her window. She reaches over to open the passenger door. "Sounds like you might need a jump. Pop your hood."

"I bet you say that to all the girls." Alison says with a smirk as she gets out of the car. I lift her hood and avoid eye contact. I know I'm blushing and maybe that was payback for the muffin thing. I continue to try to help her with her car. About a hour later and a very serious rainstorm we sit in my car as Alison talks to her brother Jason on the phone about her car. "No, I promise we tried everything and Em is pretty savvy with cars her dad taught her a lot." I look up from texting Hanna that I was running late for our sleepover and the reason why, wondering exactly why Alison called me Em. I watched her get off the phone. "He said he'd come by and look at it but he's still at work so I should just go on home." She paused a second "Thank you for waiting around, I'll just call a cab so you can get along with your evening." She opens the door, and before she stands I grab her wrist.

"Now what kind of friend would I be if I didn't take you home?" I shot her the signature Fields' smile and she closed the door. She told where she stayed which was literally across the street from my mom's and next door to Spencer's. I didn't expect her to stay in her family's home. "So Ali tell me about yourself." Her ears perked up at the sound of me calling her Ali. "I mean we are the same age, and I know of your family but only hear of you."

"Well first of all thank you for not judging me on what you heard. Let's see my mom and dad spilt when I was a kid. Jason stayed with my mom and I went with my dad. I was getting in a lot of trouble so they sent me to boarding school, I ended up in Paris and stayed there until I graduated. I came back here for college and by that time all of you had left for college. I became a teacher and got married to my childhood sweetheart. He moved here from London, he was the headmaster's son at my school." She smiled softly as if memories danced around in her head.

"I'm so sorry about your mom and husband." I practically whispered not really wanting to ruin her thoughts. We pulled in to her driveway. "I actually live across the street, it's my mom's place. But she's moving and I'm looking for a place but if you need anything. I'm just a text or call away."

"What a small world. And thank you… for everything. I'm sorry about your dad too by the way." She laid her hand on top of mine and rubbed it with her thumb.

"Thank you." We said goodbye and I went he to grab my already packed bag and check on mom before leaving for Hanna's. As soon as I get back in my car I get a text from Spence asking can I bring Ali with me. Apparently Ali was invited to the sleepover because Spence is an amazing cousin as well as friend and when Ali texted her and told her she couldn't make it because of car trouble I got volunteered. Not that I mind, but I wonder why Ali didn't ask me. I pulled into her driveway again, this time getting out of the car. I walk up to the door vaguely remembering coming here a few times for parties. I heard footsteps then a muffled 'one second' from Ali. So I waited. She finally came to the door, her hair was wet, her cheeks red.

"Hi. Sorry I was in the shower." I looked at her up and down she smelled glorious and looked the same in just a pair of jeans and a top. I struggled to get my thoughts together.

"I was informed that you need a ride to the sleepover." I bowed and pointed with my hand to my car "You chariot awaits madam… well whenever you are ready of course." She laughed and said she had to pack a few more things then she'd be ready. I sat in the living room and waited on her. I found myself looking around. I am a firm believer that you can tell a lot about a person by their home. I notice tons of pics on the wall. I stand to get a closer look. It's her entire life in photos. Baby Ali is possibly the most precious thing I've ever seen. She's so mesmerizing, I'm so lost I don't realize her come stand beside me.

"There's tons of more pictures. My mother loved to scrapbook and make photo albums. Maybe I'll show them to you one day." She walked over to the couch to pick up her bag and I just nodded on agreement and took her bag from her. We walked to the car after she locked her front door and I put her bag next to mine. The ride was fairly silent as I was lost in thoughts of the beauty beside me. How said of a life she had growing up away from her family and i only person she probably made a connection with was her husband then she lost both her husband and mom. I mean true she still has Jason but I cannot imagine how she feels. "You're thinking mighty loud Em." I'm brought back to reality by her voice.

"Yeah just thinking." I could feel her star at me waiting on me to elaborate. "You might be one of the strongest people I know. You've been through so much and you still have a beautiful way about how you treat people, you teach for a living that alone takes a special kind of person. I don't know, I'm just really happy we got the chance to meet, and get to know each other." I look over at her and she's smiling, dimples showing. I try not to swoon, but I'm sure I'm blushing. We pull up to Han's And before we can get out of the car Ali leans in and kisses my cheek. I blush even harder.

"I may be the strongest but you are the sweetest Emily Fields. And I'm happy we met too." I try to hide my excitement. I grab our bags as we make out way to the door sneaking glances at one another. Aria opens the door and I put our bags where everyone else's are as I notice a smirk on Spencer's face. I know that look and I know what she's thinking I just roll my eyes and give her the finger which doesn't ho unnoticed by everyone else as they look at us questioningly. We decide on Chinese food, and picked out four movies. The Shining, The Notebook, The Little Mermaid, and The Breakup. Everyone picked out there favorite movie just so happened Ali and I picked the same one. We all talk and just catch up while we wait on food. I'm talking to Hanna about the swim team when I overhear Ali talking to Spencer about baking.

"No they were amazing, ask Em." Instantly I know she's king about her muffins and I know Spencer will not let this one go so easy.

"So Em… you've tasted Ali's muffin? How amazing was it?" She could barely get it out for laughing so hard. I threw up pillow at her as I stood up to answer the door. Aria chimed in.

"You never liked muffins when I made them Em." I just glared at her.

"Maybe Ali's muffin is special. And Aria yours are always a little dry." Hanna couldn't help herself.

"So Em… Ali's muffin is moist?" Spencer is in complete tears from laughing now. I look over at Ali who is very amused by the whole thing.

"Grow up! I hope you choke on your egg roll… okay no I don't but still." I hand everyone their food and Ali grazes my hand while I hand over hers. I'm almost sure that she has been flirting with me but honestly it's been awhile since either of us has probably even thought about dating and maybe she's not flirting maybe she's just touchy feely and very friendly. I look up at the screen as The Little Mermaid plays. I'm sitting alone at the kitchen table. I realize the only free space is on the couch by Ali. I put my food up and take my place. I'm sitting on the end so I put one arm on the rest and the other one on the back of the couch. I look around and for the first time in a long time I feel like I'm home.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Half way through the last movie we are watching, The Notebook, I realize everyone is asleep except for me. I pause the movie and go to the bathroom. I find myself in Spencer's backyard sitting on the couch. Rosewood has been full of it's ups and downs but overall I love who it has made me. I love my parents, I miss my dad so much, and more than anything I love friends. I am brought out of my thoughts by the door opening. It's Ali and she has a blanket draped around her, she sits unnecessarily close to me. She sighs.

"You know it's like 4am and technically today is the anniversary of the day that I lost my husband and mom. Spencer knew and she didn't want me to be alone." I hear her voice crack and I knew she was having a hard time holding back the tears.

"When Maya died, I was young maybe 17 and she meant the world to me. My parents loved me, my mom was still trying to deal with me coming out when I was 15. If it wasn't for those girls in there I wouldn't have made it. Hanna kept me drunk that summer, Aria brought me food and books, and Spencer would just sit with me hours while I cried. They did the same thing when my dad passed away. I can honestly say that your cousin is amazing and now that you are a part of this group we will always take care of you." She laid her head on my shoulder and I felt warm tears hit my arm. I repositioned myself to wrap my arm around her. I let her cry until she couldn't anymore. She lifted her head to wipe her face as she begins to giggle. I look at her confusingly.

"I haven't cried since the day I found out. I cried when Jason called me and after that I made myself too busy too emotionally unavailable to deal with it. It feels good to cry and be near someone who understands what I went through not because they pity me but because they know how it feels to lose a parent and a lover." She grabbed my hand and held it as she rubbed the side of my index finger with her thumb. We sat there like that, in our own little world, until the sun came up. We talked about life, about love, about family, and about friends. I learned all about how wild Ali was when she was younger how she dated older boys, broke all the rules, and was mean but she said she did it for attention because she felt invisible to her parents. She spoke of her best friends Mona and Jenna how they were also reformed mean girls and I knew both. Hanna and Mona are really close and she's also marrying Mike who is Aria's little brother. And Jenna is Toby's stepsister. She also talked about how she was bisexual and her first real relationship was with a girl named Shana and how even though she'd never admitted it she always thought she would've been happier forever with Shana instead of Elliot. She told me how she met Elliot and how they grew to be friends and it felt right for them to be together because he was the only one who stuck by her side. She said their love was convenient and it grew into something beautiful and comfortable but it lacked spark.

I also told her all about me from relationship to my drinking problem. I even told her that I had kissed all the girls before Hanna on a dare, Aria kissed me because she wanted to know how to kiss before her first kiss which was with Ali's brother which made it even more hilarious, and Spencer some drunken night she came to visit me at college. I told her about Maya and how I hadn't really found anyone I wanted to let in and love since even though I dated around a lot. Talking to Ali was like talking to the girls. She was comfortable, she was relatable, and she was caring. She hangs on every word, and between her smile and her laugh I find myself in a trance from time to time at how genuine they are. We stay holding hands through the whole time we talk and maybe three hours into us talking Spencer comes outside with coffee mugs in hand. "Three creams two sugars for you Fields, and for my beautiful cousin no cream five sugars." She hands us our drinks as the other girls join us. Hanna hands Spencer her coffee and we all sit and talk. I catch a glimpse of something in Spencer's eyes as she looks back and forth from Ali and I. I internally scream when I realize Ali Andi are still holding hands. I begin to realize that Spencer may have set us up. In true Spencer fashion she knew Ali and I would get along extremely well and so it was only a matter of time before we crossed the line.

After we ate breakfast we all went our separate ways. I took Ali home of course. It was Saturday and we were all supposed to meet up for brunch tomorrow. But as for the rest of my day I had nothing planned. I remembered that my mom was making dinner later so I asked Ali if she wanted to join us. I couldn't stand to think of her having to be alone for long today. When we got to her place Jason was working on her car and I'm sure they'll spend some time today in remembrance of their mom. I told my mom Ali was coming over which made her beyond happy and I went to lay on my bed. I began to think about Ali and ended up dozing off. When I woke up it was already 5pm, and Ali is supposed to be here by now. I look at my phone, no Ali, so I hop in the shower. I'm not in there long but when I'm changing into my clothes I here my mom talking to someone presumably Ali. I hurry myself and rush down stairs.

"Well there she is," my mom cooed as she finished setting up the table. Ali and I hug, she smells so good. I catch my mom smirking at us.

"Sorry I accidentally fell asleep." I stated bashfully. I look over at Ali.

"It's fine. I shouldn't have kept you up all night." She threw a smile and wink my way that didn't go unnoticed by my mom either. We sat down to eat dinner. Four hours later, several glasses of wine later for my mom and Ali, and a delicious meal, my mom excuses herself for the night. I offer to clean the kitchen since my mom did all the hard work and Ali decides to help. We put up the leftovers but not before I pack her a plate to go, it's the Fields way. We clear the table and wash the dishes by hand. I wash, she dries. We fall into our usual conversation where we talk about everything and absolutely nothing. Our hands clumsy touch one another's while neither of us wants to admit it's on purpose as I pass the dishes to her. She's intoxicated, and also intoxicating. Ali doesn't even know how beautiful she is, or maybe she just forgot. She sits at the table while I put the dishes up, I can feel her staring at me. I put up the last pan and walk over to the table. Before I could take a seat she stands up and we are face to face so close our nose almost touch. She clears her throat before saying she has to go because it had been a long day and unlike me she didn't get to nap. I chuckle but I understand.

She grabs her plate and I walk her across the street. She politely says thank you. We stand on her porch in an awkward silence for a few minutes and right when we lock eyes she kisses me. I don't pull away, mostly because I don't want to but because I think she just wants to feel something other than pain today. She has her free hand on my lower back, one of my hands is on her face while the other around her waist pulling her into me. She tastes like wine. Her lips are so soft, she's an amazing kisser, and her scent engulfs me. I don't want this to end so I push on the already unlocked door and guide us inside. We only break apart so she can sit her food down and we end up on her couch. All I feel is her warmth. Hands all over my body, lips against mine every now and then they trail to my neck. My body is on fire, I feel so alive. We stop to catch our breath leaning our for heads against each other's. Her eyes are as beautiful as she is. I tell myself to snap out of it because I know this feeling. I'm falling, but I don't want to hurt Ali nor do I want to be hurt. We're both very vulnerable and we could easily create a bond on our emptiness. But I don't want to this to end either. Like she could read my mind "Emily, stay the night. We can just sleep. I promise." How could I say no to that, why would I.

We made our way to the bedroom where I look off my shoes and she tosses a pair of pajama pants at me. She began to change out of her clothes and I try not to stare. But trust me I am. She puts on an over sized t-shirt and that's it. Her body is a wonderland. She goes to the bathroom and I change out of my jeans into the pajama bottoms. I get in bed. And automatically my mind wanders to exactly what this could mean. She walks back in, and turns the light off before joining me in bed. She slides closer to me, and wraps her arm around me. I played in her hair and we just laid there in silence until we both fell asleep. I woke up in the middle of the night to go pee as usual, only to realize Ali was no longer in bed. I went to pee and notice a light on downstairs. I follow the light. Ali was sitting on the couch with a photo album. I sat beside her looking down at pictures of her and her mother. I know this pain. I put my hand on her knee, she puts her hand on my hand. "It almost feels like a dream. Like she's not dead. But sometimes I go through my days and I don't think about her at all or Elliot and I think to myself 'who is this monster?'" She closes the book and sits back. I take a shaky breath knowing this feeling all too well.

"You know they'd want you to move forward, and to be happy. It doesn't make you a bad person, it makes you normal. Some days it's like everything reminds you of them, others you're so busy living that you barely have time to think about any of it. But you'll always have these memories, you shouldn't feel guilty for making new ones." I watched her stand up and take off her long shirt as she stood in front of me uncovered. My breath catches and she straddles me. "Ali, wha… what are you doing?" I barely let out before her eyes were full of fire and her hands were on the back on my neck and her tongue in my mouth. Everything became one big blur as I let the pleasure take over.

"Making new memories."


End file.
